From Iron Bars to Distant Shores (Part 2) : A Mother’s Struggle and Journey

// From tearful prison visits to lying alone in a hospital bed — she bore it all to hold herself and her broken family together.

With motherly love and unyielding conviction, she bravely proclaims: “I can still say it loud — I am who I am.” //

After arriving overseas, what began as a temporary break for Kin's Mum turned into a decision to seek asylum. In just a few years, her fate shifted many times — the fatigue, confusion, and sorrow she experienced are difficult for outsiders to comprehend. On top of an uncertain future, Kin's Mum now faces even greater trials. Yet despite the mounting challenges, she remains full of hope and continues striving to support fellow Hongkongers.

Though the road ahead is unclear, Kin's Mum has not lost her heart. After arriving, she actively planned for long-term livelihood. In 2023, following her asylum application, she secured a full-time job at a local restaurant in her new city, allowing her to financially support her family. She had hoped to gradually rebuild her life and later return to supporting the Hong Kong community.

However, after years of balancing heavy family responsibilities and daily prison visits to her son Kin Jai, along with emotional stress, the exhaustion of her long and unstable journey eventually took a toll on her health.

Since last year, Kin's Mum’s health has been deteriorating, forcing her to resign from full-time work and switch to part-time in order to rest. Unfortunately, a recent medical check-up brought more bad news — she now needs to focus on recovery for the foreseeable future. Speaking about her illness, Kin's Mum does not show pessimism. She sees this period as a time for "maintenance and repair," to rebuild strength for the journey ahead. As she awaits more detailed treatment plans, she also looks forward to finally reuniting peacefully with her children.

Kin's Mum, who has worked tirelessly, says her biggest wish now is: “To have a roof over our heads, to give them a home again.” She feels she has failed as a mother, having been away for more than two years and unable to care for her children still in Hong Kong. Thankfully, her children did not hold it against her — one even left school early to take on the family's burden. Under the same roof, at least they have each other. The monthly financial aid from the Bonham Tree Aid has also helped ease the family’s financial strain.

Anyone who has lived abroad will know how difficult it is to be sick and alone in a foreign land — the yearning for close family becomes even more intense. Kin's Mum acknowledges this but understands her children are growing up and have their own lives. She doesn’t demand they stay by her side or make sacrifices for her. Even after her son regained his freedom last year and faced the worsening situation in Hong Kong, Kin's Mum never asked him to abandon his friends still imprisoned. She leaves the decision to them. What she can do now is offer them all the support she can.

The protest has left Kin's Mum’s life in pieces — her family separated by oceans. Leaving home alone was already a heavy burden. To also relinquish the duties of motherhood made her decision even weightier. Speaking of her children's arrest, she blames herself for not being a good mother, yet firmly believes they did nothing wrong: “It’s not my kids who did wrong. It’s this government.”

Due to the vast geography of many foreign countries, most Hongkonger support organisations and events are centered in major cities. This makes it harder for people outside these hubs to find help or engage with the diaspora. In Kin's Mum’s city, for example, there is no longer an active local Hongkonger group. She hopes to contribute to supporting exiled Hongkongers and help organise a local community if her health permits.

Kin's Mum has her own ideas about how best to help fellow Hongkongers abroad. She hopes to act as a parental figure — guiding young exiles through their initial settlement and adaptation, helping them take their first steps. Once her own support efforts become stable, she plans to become a platform to consolidate resources for more people.

Seeing how many overseas Hongkonger communities hit roadblocks or fall into internal conflict after a few years, Kin's Mum is wary of being seen as someone “profiting off others' suffering.” She insists she is the type who prefers to quietly get things done, not one to lead an NGO or similar effort. She emphasises the importance of working within her own limits.

As for the future, Kin's Mum says that even if she has the chance to participate in Hongkonger-related work, she would prefer to contribute as a volunteer. She reveals that in the past, fellow protesters had invited her to join community projects, but due to her health, she had to decline — hoping instead to take part once she has recovered.

Looking back on her journey over the past five or six years, Kin's Mum sums it up with lyrics from the classic Cantopop song “Man Ngo” (Ask Me), believing the song best reflects her state of mind. Through this interview, we see a woman who has endured countless ups and downs, tears and laughter, yet continues to hold fast to her beliefs — still determined to do what she believes is right, and still able to sing out: “I can still say it loud — I am who I am.”

Illustration: Hongkonger

Text: Vincent Vega

Translation: Hongkonger